In case you hadn't heard, I had a birthday this week. I decided that I'd like to have dinner at one of our favorite places in our small town. On Tuesday night, we hopped in the pickem up truck and headed to town for the big birthday feast. We were driving along, I'm yakking in the DF's ear and he's doing what he does best...ignoring me, when suddenly we zagged right when we should've been zigging left. The truck was slammed into reverse and we were heading backwards, from whence we had already come and on the wrong side of the road. Of course, we're all yelling..."what's going on? What are you doing?" And as cars started coming toward us and swerving around us, one of us may have said "what the frick, man? Have you lost your mind?" But, he wouldn't hear our cries, because he had already abandoned the truck and left the door hanging wide open.
Now, seems strange, but The DF always seems to know what he's doing....he has it all figured out in his own mind. But, what he neglects to do is let the rest of us in on his grand plan. So, many times, we are left sitting in the car on the side of the road while he checks on a crop, or, in this case....picks up a bolt he spied lying on the ground.
Yes, that's right. He saw a bolt about 4 inches long, lying on the side of the road. Who cares you might say? And, let me tell ya, I was thinking the same thing. So what...a bolt, what's the big deal? We are to be watching a Japanese man spin an egg on the side of a spatula right about now. He jumped back in the car and said "I think it came out of one of the tractors." Um, ok . What makes you think that some random bolt lying on the side of the road about 1 and 1/2 miles from our house, came from one of OUR tractors?
Seems that they had been hauling manure all day- yes, on my birthday....it's how he rolls...he loves to create a big neighborhood stink, in my honor, because nothing says happy birthday, darlin' like gagging and retching when you walk out your front door. Anywho- the tractors had been running to one of our other farms most of the day and taking this same path we were traveling, so when he spied a bolt on the road, he put 2 and 2 together.
Now, once he got in the truck, he did indeed confirm that it had fallen out of one of our tractors and just a few minutes earlier. Ok, Sherlock, how on earth do you know that? And, like some kind of Native American Indian Tacker, he held it, rolled it around in his hand, licked the end of his finger to test the wind and took a long sniff and said "because it's still warm." I kid, a little bit....he just held it.
I guess at this point, I'm kind of in awe. This eagle eyed man is forever pointing out deer, fox and various birds of prey on the side of the road when we we are out driving around and I....never....see....a...thing. I guess it's all those years of hunting? Or maybe they are right there and I am that blind? Or maybe I'm that self involved that I don't take the time to "LOOK OUT THE WINDOW AND ENJOY THE VIEW!!!" That's a private joke- it's what the DF is always yelling at the kids when they start asking "are we there yet?" His tirade continues with bits and pieces of: "...never had movies in OUR car or...no such thing as ipods when I was young" yada, yada, yada.
On we go to our other farm where we see one of the tractors waiting on it's next load. The Dairy Farmer walks up and tells the guy he found this bolt on the road and figures it's from one of the tractors.....well, just so happens it was. It was an alternator bolt and the guy had just put it on. Had the DF not found it, they may have had a bit of an issue later on that night. The guy running the tractor looked at me in the truck and shrugged his shoulders as if to say "what the heck?" And I did the same thing back.
Now, for some reason....I find this story hilarious....I don't know why, maybe because it's so...odd? But, that is what it's like to live with the super sleuth of Brechland Farms. I think I just found him a new hobby. All he needs is this:
And I totally call Daphne!
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